


Behind The Illusion

by MorganaNK



Category: Inspector Lynley - All Media Types, Inspector Lynley Mysteries (TV)
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-06 23:51:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11611554
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganaNK/pseuds/MorganaNK
Summary: An introspective, set after 'Deception On His Mind'





	Behind The Illusion

**Author's Note:**

> Property of Elizabeth George and the BBC, no copyright infringement intended
> 
> Inspiration credit - Jodi Ann Bickley

I am an expert at keeping people at arm’s length while hiding behind an illusion of contentment. I am perpetually angry, and I channel that anger into further alienating those I encounter, terrified that they might see me for who I really am.

I know I’m good at what I do, but my attitude continually sabotages it. It’s like I have an internal bully who whispers negatively in my ear, taking perverse delight in detailing all my faults, foibles and failings, and making me even angrier. 

And then along comes Detective Inspector Thomas Lynley, and things gradually begin to change. Well, some things do.

He sees something in me that no one else has; sees past the defences that I have so carefully erected around the woman who is broken, scared and alone. He’s held out the hand of friendship, and no matter how many times I push him away, he persists.

The kindness he shows confuses me. Most people would want something in exchange, but not him. It has taken me a long time to understand that he gets pleasure from being able to help; that is his reward.

He’s worn away some of my rough edges, shown me that having someone to bounce ideas off, to help carry the load and watch my back; well, it doesn’t have to be a bad thing. 

Against the odds we have become friends. Having someone who know me and yet likes me is a novel experience, but one I have grown to appreciate and cherish. That doesn’t mean it’s all sunshine and roses, but it works for us.

Now he’s married to Helen, and for him, nothing has changed. He’s still the same Tommy Lynley he’s always been. I wish I could say that things are the same for me but I can’t. Somewhere along the line, and completely unintentionally, I fell in love with him, and now I feel more alone than ever.

Guess I’ll just have to go back to hiding behind that illusion, and hope Tommy doesn’t examine it, or me, too closely.


End file.
